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This Is The New Shit

What happens next I leave to your imagination. You’re welcome.

I am really annoyed by the mass of ‘3D-enhanced’ movies flooding the cinemas the last two years. It is adding nothing at all to these mediocre (at best) movies. They even do 3D-porn now. Google it if you don’t trust my word. And to imagine they go the same path Hollywood does, meaning throwing constantly stuff at the audience…. ugh, I think I am getting sick. Curse you, Imagination!

That is all I have to say about this 3D-hype. And this.

10 Comments

  1. Actually, I like 3D-effects in movies (except the old anaglyphes, they just plain suck and are a pain to watch ).

    What I really dislike: new effects/features always made it easier for the movies with stupid/lame/non-existent stories to make it into the cinema – this happened with color, stereo-sound, THX and now with 3D. And there you are right: the trash floods the cinemas.
    But this is partially the people’s fault – since in the end they decide whether (or not) to pay for the tickets :-(

    But, there are still (and hopefully always be) some decent flicks around … just a question of finding a good theatre (Berlin: Arsenal, Sputnik, …).

    Cheerio!

    PS: There is porn in the internet? Nana, I don’t believe you, you are just pulling a leg. If there truly was some porn in the internet, nobody would be dating any more in the real life!

    1. .. would be dating in RealLife (TM) anymore.

      (How to edit comments? Or how to preview? I miss those features… would be great to have the chance to fix stuff)

      1. pheww. Where to start?
        Ok, I start with being a smart-ass: THX is not a real feature as such. It is merely a ‘quality assurance system’. Of course with its trailer (The audience is now deaf) it somewhat pretends to be a new technology.

        It’s not that I completely dislike the 3D-effect itself. It is, as you pointed out yourself, that it is mostly used in crap flicks and only used to throw stuff at me (what, by the way, can be fun in horror-movies. Once or twice, but not constantly). Then there is the matter of the already high ticket prizes, which rise again. Then I do not like to sit 90 minutes or more with these glasses on. Additionally they darken the picture. And (wow, I can go on for hours) film-makers need to rethink their filming-technique. For example the heavy use of depth-of-field doesn’t work well with 3D (in my opinion).
        Call me when they invented the holo-deck.
        What we are agree on is that the amount of 3D-crap is partially peoples fault. But what do you expect from people who even like the cheesy visuals of an ‘Avatar’? (Awww. Am I offensive now? Even a ‘mean prick’ by any chance? ;) )

        Fun fact… well, fact at least: I first wanted to made this weeks episode in (simulated) anaglyph. But it was really a pain to look at ;)

        Of course I don’t know nothing about porn. But I’ve been told one can find it on the interwebs. But I am fairly sure there is no such thing as a real life. And what is this ‘dating’-thingy you are talking about?

        About the edit/preview of comments: I will look into it. But even I, writing from inside wordpress, can’t preview my comments. Strange, isn’t it? Also I would like to offer you the option to get an email if someone replies to your comments. But since I am to dumb to even highlight the comments-link, you shouldn’t hold your breath. ;)

        Cheers! And let’s have a whiskey sometime soon. I still have a fine bottle waiting to be opened ;)

  2. Wow, somebody got a lot of time …. or is just that fast ;)

    I’ll keep it shorter, need my sleep (call me “old” :-P ) before going out on an average Saturday (will look for RealLife and Dating-thingy – promised!).

    * THX – okay, replace it with “Surround-Sound” (nit-picker!)
    * ticket-prices – since you do not like the 3D-movies, don’t pay the price, watch crappy movies in 2D :-P .. if people pay, let’s pay ‘em (and let’s call it capitalism)
    * filming/camera-technique – they just came up with mass-compatible 3D, so just give em some time to learn how to handle/use the 3rd dimension properly
    * Holodeck – NIOL – Not in our lifetime… :(
    But at least there might be DukeNukem Forever in our lifetime ^_^
    * Heretic, to claim that Avatar had cheesy visuals – it was all blue and green, and even with explosions. And there was a hint of boobs in every single frame (I remember)! Great stuff!

    So far :-)

    1. Just reporting back from the outer world:

      1.) RealLife sucked big-time – being sober for two hours made me look old, tired and fat in the mirror … thankfully that just lasted till the first beer.
      2.) Dating-Thingy was more complex than expected – my ancient asian ass-grabbing-technique was not as welcomed as expected (not even if subject was drunk (but still conscious)) .. will need to find a better approach, may the Google show me the way!

  3. Mhmmm.. I just realized, that you had some american-style toilet-seat… haven’t seen that before, shame on me.

    On a second thought (and with the funny yellow flashlight on the left) – was this picture, by any chance, taken with a vag-cam from the inside of your robotic I-Girlfriend?

    Yours, sincerely puzzled
    /hannes

    1. Alright, you got me. That picture had been taken by my iGirlfriends vag-cam, then I plugged my USB-stick in her and directly uploaded the pic. By the way, that gives a whole new meaning to the words ‘photo shoot’…
      Ah well, I had not imagined after this comic the standards can be lowered. But we managed. Hooray to us!

      Is it really american-style? Didn’t know. I made this kind of seat, because the usual round one is too boring. Not that I get overly excited by this one… (What did I just wrote about standards?!).
      And please tell me that I don’t need to point out to you that this ‘flashlight’ is one of these toilet-air-freshening-thingamabobs.

      1. No, you do not need to point out what the yellow thingy is, but I still haven figured that brown stain on the right :-P
        (oh yeah, here we go again)

        SORRY – but I did not come up with that topic, just trying to adjust (and raising my own standards) ;-)

  4. Dafuq did i just read?

    Btw. A smartphone optimized version of the blog would be considred highly convinient. Cheers

    1. Don’t know. What did you just read?

      An optimized version for smartphones? Ha. Laughing my ass off. It is not even optimized for pc :)

      On a completely unrelated note: interesting website you got there. I take it this one is optimized for mobile?! :)

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